Bitch Bible
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Bitch Bible
A podcast that dares to say what many are thinking, but only a bitch would say. Expect unfiltered and unapologetic discussions about sex, millennial struggles, pop culture, social faux-pas and hopefully, an insightful takeaway. Nothing is off limits. Hosted by Jackie Schimmel, creator of blog “The...
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Woman in Crisis!
Jackie has a harrowing near death experience with her geriatric grandmother, tackles climate change and recaps the latest pop culture happenings.
Bump Bible: A Gender Bender
It is week 7 and the symptoms are symptoming. The future demon seed is the size of a blueberry and driving Jackie into the arms of a Wetzels Pretzels...
Entertaining the Masses with Nina Parker
Jackie sits down with tv host Nina Parker to discuss their days together in Entertainment TV, why Jackie hates check-ins, and Clyde's alien abduction...
Bump Bible: Trepidatious
Week 6 and Jackie is in limbo. Things are starting to get real, but she can’t tell anyone about the pregnancy yet. Except everyone at her local Italia...
Straight Outta Economy
Jackie is getting back to her economy roots and discusses a confrontation at Nordstrom Rack, manipulating pregnancy in her favor, and the joy of Ashle...
Bitch Bible Classics: Loner Boner
Jackie recaps the Real Housewives, the local hero that lost it after no birthday gift and delights listeners with a Grammy worthy vocal performance!
Welcome to the Bump Bible
Jackie begins a chronicle of her second pregnancy, speaking directly to moms with deep maternal care, understanding, and Plan B jokes.
Thanks...
The Chosen One
The stars have aligned to bring back El Pollo Loco’s BBQ Black Beans and the Taco Bell Enchirito just as Jackie is starting her third trimester and ra...
Dork Dork 2000
Jackie celebrates the union of Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce by reviewing their modest guest list, describes Clyde’s role in her recent public nudity,...
Community in Misery.
Jackie’s in a mood after being continuously serenaded by Shakira seven days a week and discusses the most recent kerfuffle in the backyard renovation,...
The Patina Princess
Jackie is hunkered down against toxic smoke and gives an update on the backyard renovation, ridicules Andrew’s new recreational basketball league, and...
Bitch Bible Classics: $6.66
Jackie gets baptized after a demonic bowl of poke, discussed the highly anticipated sequel to "Frankly, Anne" and offers free public relation guidance...
Ugly, Fat, Poor
Jackie’s back after two weeks of guests and ready to rip into pregnancy discomfort, Anna Faris’ media appearances, and Kathleen. Especially Kathleen.<...
Future Rich with Haley Sacks
Jackie is joined by Haley Sacks, Mrs. Dow Jones herself, to discuss making good decisions with money, why at-home laser hair removal is more financial...
Red Flags with Jared Freid
Jackie sits down with Jared Freid to discuss men worshiping at the altar of options, bridesmaid inflection, male influencers, and Jared’s new book Wal...
A Duplex of Disdain
Andrew makes a rare appearance to attest to Jackie’s record-setting recent bitchiness, while she gives the world a warning, reveals her kink, and upda...
Bitch Bible Classics: Meet Me At Alcatraz!
Jackie leaves the country with a real bang by planning the Bitch Bible retreat at Alcatraz island, shares her most recent valley kabob experience, Sel...
AcTuALLy
Jackie has a fresh appreciation for Bitch Bible listeners and gives her new critics a mantra to repeat, shares some big personal news, and contemplate...
Hallelujah
Jackie is fresh off celebrating herself for Mother’s Day and rips overly sentimental holiday social media posts, continues her delayed review of Summe...
The Bitch Wears Prada, Too
Jackie is back from a weekend of circus acts, self-care, and Miranda Priestly and recounts a surprising trip to a psychic, reviews the Devil Wears Pra...
You Good Girl?
Jackie is getting over being possessed by a mysterious illness and gives her final thoughts about Alex Cooper and Alix Earle, describes how Clyde is a...
Blonde on Blonde Crime
Jackie sits down with Morgan Stewart to weigh in on the Alex Cooper/Alix Earle fallout, how they are going to manufacture their own feud, and what’s w...
Bitch Bible Classics: Long Shame Strategy
This is a great episode, Jackie recaps how King Richard changed her life, the time she got kicked out of a youth sports league for breaking someone's...
You Don’t Deserve Her
Jackie is solo parenting AGAIN and praises women at the Masters, addresses future concerns about her health due to her soon to be protruding clavicles...
This Is Me Trying
Jackie has settled into spring and discusses proper parenting at wineries, gives a lukewarm review of Summer House, and tries to explain her alien fro...
An-tweaking
Jackie is fresh off a little reckless antiquing to discuss Gloria’s termite infestation, her philanthropic passion for serving alcohol in old folks ho...
Diagnosis: Bitch
Behold Jackie, Destroyer of Content, discusses Taylor Frankie Paul’s implosion, Melissa Wood-Tepperberg’s self indulgent ADHD diagnosis, and current o...
Bitch Bible Classics: Keep Eating
Jackie talks making babies, Real Housewives and consults Grandma Gloria for movie reviews.
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Live, Laugh, Bulimia
Jackie is coming off a social media fast and recounts Gloria’s recent near death experience, reviews the Oscars fashion, and graces listeners with ans...
Slapping the Bass, Slapping Your Face
After reviewing past episodes Jackie realizes the show is as great as it has ever been, issues an apology, discusses her blunt but honest communicatio...
Paranormal Bitchxperience
Jackie is back from a grueling commercial shoot and talks about the toll of being social, the two approved methods of socialization for females, and a...
Sisterhood of the Tic Tac Penis with Girls Gotta Eat
Jackie is joined by Ashley and Rayna from Girls Gotta Eat to talk about micro-penises, their four and a half hairs, Jackie’s recent exorcism, and Pamp...
Bitch Bible Classics: My Unorthodox Asshole
Jackie discusses some aesthetic revisions she would like to make in 2022, discovers her husband's childhood attempts at poetry and goes over some cele...
Por Qué
Jackie makes a strong case for mother of the year with her Valentine’s Day dedication to Clyde and his grown up vocabulary, explains to Andrew what a...
No Curation
Jackie has been struck by divine inspiration for her backyard renovation and talks about her grand welcome to the stone yard, Clyde’s night in Abu Ghr...
Linear Lantern Energy
Jackie continues to persevere through facial paralysis to bring you a recap of the Grammys and Clyde’s visit to urgent care, while also taking a momen...
Mommy's a Bitch!
Jackie is back from the clinic with 110 units of youthful rejuvenation and fighting through facial paralysis to discuss Little Ricki’s baby, Taylor Sw...
Bitch Bible Classics: Isn't She Lovely!
Jackie desperately tries to eradicate her previously questionable behavior by giving the world a wholesome (not really), informative (kinda) and intel...
lol Sorry
Jackie exposes her plastic surgery journey in the most embarrassing way possible, dissects the “2016” trend and reminisces and details her most recent...
Name the Puppy
Jackie is sticking with her New Years resolution and sets the financial record straight, does a deep dive into Ashley Tisdale’s toxic mom group, and e...